Interviewing a nanny can feel a bit awkward at first.
You are sitting across from someone who may end up caring for your child in your home, often during the busiest and most vulnerable parts of your day. So yes, it matters that they seem warm and kind. But it also matters that you ask the right questions.
A lot of families make one of two mistakes.
They either keep the interview too casual and come away feeling like, "She was lovely, so I think it's fine," or they make it so formal that they never actually get a feel for the person behind the answers.
The sweet spot is somewhere in the middle.
You want to ask enough to understand how this person thinks, how they handle real-life situations, and whether they will fit your family's routine and values. At the same time, you want the conversation to feel human.
Below are some of the best questions to ask in a nanny interview, along with what you should really be listening for.
Start with their experience, but go deeper than the CV
Most candidates will tell you where they worked and for how long. That is useful, but it is not enough on its own.
Try questions like:
- Tell me about the children you've looked after before.
- What ages do you feel most confident with?
- What did a normal day look like in your previous role?
- What parts of childcare do you enjoy most?
These kinds of questions help you move past labels like "nanny" or "au pair" and get into the actual work they've done.
Listen for detail. A strong candidate usually answers with real examples, not vague lines like "I just did everything."
Ask about routines
Routine is one of the biggest things that affects whether a placement feels calm or chaotic.
You want to know whether the candidate can bring structure without being rigid, and whether they understand that children usually do better when the day feels steady.
Helpful questions include:
- How do you usually manage naps, meals, bath time, or homework?
- How do you help children settle into a routine?
- What do you do if a child is tired, overstimulated, or refusing to cooperate?
- How do you balance play with structure?
You are not necessarily looking for one "correct" answer. You are looking for someone who has thought about these things before and can respond calmly.
Ask how they handle discipline
This is such an important one, and many families avoid it because it feels uncomfortable.
But if your approach to discipline and communication is completely different from the candidate's, that can become a real issue later.
Try asking:
- How do you handle tantrums or big emotions?
- What do you do when a child refuses to listen?
- How do you approach boundaries?
- How would you handle siblings fighting constantly?
You want someone who can set boundaries kindly and confidently, without sounding harsh or passive.
It is also useful to listen for whether they respect the parent's lead. A good nanny can bring their own experience while still working within the family's approach.
Ask about safety and emergencies
Even if everything else feels lovely, you still need to know how someone responds under pressure.
Ask practical questions like:
- What would you do if my child had a fever while in your care?
- How would you handle choking, a fall, or an injury?
- Have you ever had to respond to an emergency with a child before?
- Do you have first aid or CPR training?
You do not need them to give you a dramatic story. You want to hear that they stay calm, act responsibly, and know when to contact you or emergency services.
In South Africa, where things like load shedding, estate access, school logistics, and longer commutes can also affect the day, practical common sense goes a long way.
Ask about communication with parents
Some of the best childcare placements still go wrong because communication is poor.
So ask about it directly. For example:
- How do you prefer to communicate with parents during the day?
- What kind of updates do you normally give?
- If something is bothering you in a role, how do you raise it?
- What do you think makes the relationship between parents and caregiver work well?
Listen for emotional maturity here.
You want someone who can communicate clearly, respectfully, and without turning every little issue into drama.
Ask about reliability and transport
This matters even more in South Africa than many families realise, especially when school runs and activities are involved.
Good questions include:
- Are you comfortable with school runs and transport?
- Do you have a valid driver's licence?
- Do you have your own vehicle, if the role requires it?
- How do you usually manage punctuality and travel time?
If driving is part of the role, do not leave this vague. Be specific about schools, distances, activities, and what your afternoons actually look like.
A candidate might sound confident until the reality of 3pm Pretoria traffic and back-to-back extra murals becomes clear.
Ask about the parts of the job people often skip over
Many families focus on the children and forget the practical side of the role.
Depending on the job, you may want to ask:
- Are you comfortable preparing simple meals for the children?
- How do you keep children's spaces tidy and organised?
- Are you comfortable with bottle washing, lunchboxes, uniforms, or school prep?
- What kinds of tasks do you see as part of a nanny role?
This is not about trying to load a childcare job with endless extra duties. It is about making sure both sides are picturing the same job.
So many problems start with assumptions.
Ask why their last role ended
This question can tell you quite a lot, if you ask it gently. Try:
- Why did your last role come to an end?
- What did you enjoy in that role?
- Is there anything you would want to be different in your next placement?
You are not looking to trap them. You are looking to understand whether they can talk about past roles with maturity.
A candidate who blames every previous family for everything is worth watching carefully.
Ask scenario-based questions
These are often more revealing than direct questions because they show how someone thinks in the moment. For example:
- What would you do if my child refused to get dressed and we were already late?
- What would you do if two siblings were both crying and needed you at once?
- What would you do if my child said you promised something that you didn't?
- How would you handle a child who is clingy with mom and upset when she leaves?
Scenario questions help you hear whether someone is calm, practical, patient, and emotionally steady.
Don't ignore the fit question
A nanny can be experienced and still not be right for your family.
That is why it helps to ask a few questions that bring out personality and style, such as:
- What kind of family environment do you work best in?
- What kind of children do you enjoy working with most?
- What do you think helps a placement last well?
- What do you need from parents in order to do your job well?
These answers can help you spot whether the match feels natural or forced.
What red flags should you watch for?
Not every imperfect answer is a red flag. But there are a few things worth paying attention to.
Be cautious if a candidate:
- answers everything very vaguely
- cannot explain their past experience clearly
- seems defensive when asked simple questions
- speaks badly about every previous employer
- is inconsistent about references, dates, or duties
- seems cold, flat, or deeply uninterested in the children themselves
- avoids practical questions about transport, reliability, or routine
Sometimes the issue is not dramatic. It is just a feeling that the person is not grounded enough for the job.
That feeling is worth listening to.
Final thought
A nanny interview is not about catching someone out. It is about getting enough real information to make a wise decision.
You want to leave the conversation thinking:
- I understand how this person works
- I can picture them in our home
- I trust how they think
- I know where we align and where we may need clarity
The best interviews feel clear, calm, and revealing. Not rushed. Not vague. Not overly polished.
And remember, good questions do not just help you assess the candidate. They also show the candidate that your family is thoughtful and serious about the placement.
Looking for stronger nanny candidates from the start? Sitters Co helps families interview with more confidence and less guesswork.